facebook.

Facebook. Ah. So much safer than the pedophilic MySpace. No possible encounter of rapeage -- what does a parent have to worry about?

Facebook is just as risky as any other site. I think it just gives off a safer vibe. SO KIDS. Don't give our your age, or your phone number, or your address, or extremely identifying pictures of yourself. Like me. What can I say? I like the thrill.

...

If you haven't already, you should all check out Julian's 25 things he hates about facebook.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PVA047JAQsk

Let's see... what do I hate about facebook. He stole all the good ones.

1. Notifications. I have been too lazy to block notifications for about a good year or so already. Basically since I joined facebook. They have been consistantly spamming my gmail inbox with lovely spurts of: HE HAS COMMENTED ON YOUR PHOTO. SHE TAGGED YOU IN A NOTE. SO AND SO IS BLAH BLAH BLAH. So I went to disable notifications yesterday and I individually unchecked each box; including for applications. Which I have over 92 of.
2. Friends. Because I feel the need to have more of them. So even if I don't know you but I've heard about you from someone, I'll probably end up adding you. I'm not a stalker. I'm just Asian; okay?
3. Friend Requests. Hey, do I know you? Oh, you mean you know this other friend of mine and you just decided to add me?
   
4. Parents and the Family Tree. I'm sorry I feel awkward about being your daughter but I don't want to sound unloving so okay you can be my mother.
5. Guiness World Record Group Invites. How many constant duplcates of these have to be sent out before we break the record?
6. News Feed. Facebook has now become the best stalker community. Now you know what you're friends are doing every second of the day; and you can see what new photos they added. Or what apps they added. Or what they wanted to say to their other best friend.
7. Farmville. I don't want to do it.
8. The New Facebook. Technically it's kind of old, but when it first came out and they deleted the option for us to switch back to the normal, original facebook layout, I was completely lost. I didn't know how to operate anything. Good job.
9. Applications. I don't like these things because they get addicting. Don't invite me because I don't want to do it. I add applications if I want them. ... Be above the influence.
   

Don't get me wrong; I love facebook. It's one of my favorite social community network sites.

It just has some annoying downfalls sometimes.

this is called a lot of homework.

If I'm typing up a blog entry it's obvious I've screwed up time management. And avoiding homework.

I mean, I would do it if I understood any of it. But no; I don't. On top of that I have no interest in public speaking. Or presentations. Heard of stage fright? So I kind of just avoided the essay.

Monday is going to be terrifying.

china?

Yeah China! Of coruse I went there over the summer to catch up with relatives and the sort. And there are a couple things I'd like to let you know about China.

1. When it rains, it is rainbow poncho heaven in China. everyone rides bikes and therefore everyone wears ponchos, except for the occasional skilled umbrella riders.
2. Know how to swipe your card before you get on the bus so you don't look like a retard and stall the people behind you. Or just go behind everyone and look like a retard.
3. Don't speak English inside markets / shops unless you know how to bargain.
   
4. You may accidentally buy fake merchandise.
5. ... Don't pretend to act like you know Chinese if you don't.
6. Watch the traffic or it'll run you over; there aren't a lot of pedestrian lights on the streets. Actually now. There are practically none at all.
7. Hong Kong is not China. It is basically a New York filled with Chinese people.

Well then, I'll leave you with that and go on to doing more school-related things. I know you're missing the summer so I'll just stuff it up your nose.

hey blogger; what's up?

Missing me yet? Of course not, because you don't even know me. In fact, no one even reads this blogs aside from myself! I think I just kind of do this to escape to an alternate reality where I talk to myself like a crazed tard.

By the way. I hate doing titles in all capitals. I personally think it looks stupid. Makes it all caps or no caps, or only caps at the beginning of words.

And I even forgot to tell you all / myself about where Umchil came from. It's basically "um" from "umbrella" and "chil" from "child" put together from my deviantart username "umbrella-child".

FRUG I thought it was cute.

In any case, I'm stuck on an essay. i should probably get to work on it but I really just want to eat dinner. I came up with a really great title but the word document consists of nothing but my name and a bold heading. Let me give you all a straightforward warning: the man in The Stranger is the weirdest, most pessimistic, interesting guy you will ever read about. At least, that I've read about.

Dinner smells good. But DAMN it's not time to eat yet.

HI THERE NICE TO MEET YOU.

Hi my name's Umchil. I mean really; just call me Umchil. What if there are pedophiles on the internet.

So I've attempted several blogs before but I don't think they've really worked out so well. In any case, I never really talked about my life.

Say. Let me tell you something that happened today.

The phone rang while I was listening to some Super Junior and so I pick it up. "Hello?"
Funny. No answer. So of course I set it back down and unpause the music.

10 seconds later the phone rings again. I stand up and walk back over to it. "Hello?"
No answer again, and so I put it back down.

After the 5th call I was pissed. I brought the CD/DVD remote to the kitchen table, took out a bag of pistachios and bowl, and set the phone right next to me. I pressed play.

The calls came again and again. I ate pistachios until I felt bloated. I think that's why I didn't eat much dinner.

I'm really good at cracking pistachios now.

Prank calls? Who knows. All I know is my mama came back safe and honey I'm glad. For the time being, anyway. It won't be long until she's the next things I'm pissed at.

What are you supposed to talk about in blogs anyway?

Oh oh. One of my greatest aspirations was to have a popular blog which everyone would read.

...

The million dollar question is, who would want to read about my life?

Because I don't have one.